Category Archives: SMS Analysis

You Had Me At Hi

Do we over think text messages? When to respond? How to respond? To even respond? – One might then ask themselves, do we over think Shakespeare?

To most of you reading this “hi” is the IM (instant message) you’d get from a girl who liked you. You know, those embarrassing screen names like “qtpie5654” or some shit that you made in “4th grade”. In some ways, the social conventions of IMs have transfered over to text messaging except now you have more options, and more time to respond. Here’s the thing, whenever I get a text from someone saying “hi”, I think they either are incredibly mad disappointed with me, or like, like me. But one things for sure and it doesn’t matter the time of day, could be 3 am could be 7 am, if you get a text message from someone you’ve been “flirting” with then it’s a very good thing. It’s like a shorter way of saying “hey boo, I’m thinking of you”

“hi” goes right to the heart.

Of course, when is the proper time to use it? With great power, comes great responsibility and you never want to oversaturate the word. Like most of us, I like to confer with the Great Council of Wise  Men and Women (the people I review my texting decisions with) before hitting the send button.  When is the best time to use ‘hi”? The answer is simple. At the beginning. By the way if you have a friend named Conner, don’t ever take his advice, man Conner’s don’t know shit about texting.

For us dudes, let’s say it’s been a long day, you’re either about to go out, or you just have that urge to talk to Britney, or Britt, as of recent. Open up that iPhone, and just do it. Text her “Hi” NOTE, the capital H, it’s masculine, it says that while “hi” on average is a little more feminine, you gotta soft side, and got her on your mind. Now ladies, let’s say you’re at home watching the latest episode of GIRLS, and for some reason it makes you want to hit up Bryler, aka Bryce as is called in college. Well, same thing, take out that phone and type the two letter magical word. Be careful though, do you like like him or just like him/wanna talk? If it’s a like like – “hi.” The period makes it all. If it’s a just want to talk to then just write “hi”

Now listen, this is a tactic with a lot of variables in play. The numbers gotta add up. If there is anything to take away from this it’s that, homies, don’t be afraid to tell your lady “hi” once in a while. And ladies, 646 620 5940.